IN
A PURE FIT OF FLYING MONKEY FRENZY, THIS LETTER WAS WRITTEN AND SENT, MAILED VIA
AIR MAIL, AND MARKED "CONFIDENTIAL & PERSONAL" TO FIDEL CASTRO,
THE PREMIER OF CUBA. FOR REAL. ONE HAS TO WONDER WHAT HAPPENED.....:D (:9 OOOPH
OOOOOPH OOOOOPH)
March 22, 1994
Dear
Premier Fidel Castro,
Many years ago a loyal Comrade
and friend, John Lucas Legrasse, showed me the diary of his deceased father, John
Raymond Legrasse, a former Inspector of Police in New Orleans, Louisiana. In the
diary I read quotations from your eminence from what may have been your younger
and more noble days as a Comrade just before the Old Revolution. What you said
was very cryptical but I did not have too much of a hard time decoding it. Since
the Revolution is well known now and you are now Premier of Cuba, would you please
be kind enough to explain some things to me? I have waited and watched and have
listened carefully for the signal or call for years. Yet I have heard and seen
nothing. I will relate what was in the diary to refresh your memory so that you
may explain this to me. Also, I gather from the words Mr. Legrasse used, about
you and what you said, that he was a capitalist pig and not on the side of The
People at all.
First he wrote of what the Americans
called a crime involving what they thought to be voodoo and an idol. Of course
that was Santeria helping our Comrades and the idol was probably one of their
deities. Next, Mr. Legrasse told pig lies about horrible rites. I figured that
out too: they had the American flag turned upside-down. The pigs didn't know anything
about the origin of this "cult" and that is probably because they were
looking for religion when, in reality, this was a political revolutionary meeting
and American cops were not familiar with such things at that time. They could
never find out the origin of the "cult" but I know that its origin is
to be found with Marx and Lenin! Mr. Legrasse thought this was all so unbelievable.
Ah! They think we'd just sit by and let Colonialist Warmonger Imperialist Exploiters
of The People lord it over us all? Let them believe that if they want! Let them
think we are unbelievable! MORE POWER TO THE PEOPLE! There is a lot in the diary
about the idol the "cult" had which amounts to a lot of superstitious
idealist mysticism: opiate for the poor fools who believe it. There is a mention
of a chant, but it seems to me that it was probably something in the Russian language
being attempted by Hispanic and other non-Russian-speaking people. He translated
it as: "In his house in ...the Urals?... dead ...name of a Comrade?... waits
dreaming." Next was related how the Americans claimed people were kidnapped,
but we know that they were Comrades who snuck off to the meeting. Next was related
more superstitious nonsense about monsters and we know how they call Comrade Stalin
a monster. Next is the part where you are mentioned. I'll relate it and just write
in what I can clearly understand by interpreting the nonsense Mr. Legrasse wrote
in the following paragraphs.
The revolutionaries
gathered on a grassy island of about one acre. There was a bonfire in which anti-Communist
books were being burned. Dead Comrades were there who had been murdered by the
cops. About 100 Comrades were there. The police started to shoot their guns at
our unarmed Comrades who had only been dancing and singing. Forty-seven Comrades
were arrested for doing nothing wrong. Five were shot to death for no reason.
All of the Comrades were non-white of course. The racist pig had nasty remarks
about this in his diary. Now, according to Mr. Legrasse's diary, you told him
that you were all there honoring the Great Old Ones, Marx and Lenin, who began
our Revolution. Marx and Lenin were gone, now, inside the earth and under the
sea. I had no idea one of them was buried at sea! You told him that the fact that
they are dead means nothing: the Revolution would never die! Next you told him
of the Comrade that has his house in the Urals, but I assume he is either too
old now, or dead too. Next you told Mr. Legrasse about the stars being ready for
the signaling of the Revolution and I do recall how the pig McCarthy persecuted
famous Hollywood stars. I figured out that they were supposed to give us the signal,
but McCarthy must have been warned by people like Mr. Legrasse and so the stars
were scared off. Maybe the riots in the 1960's were an abortive attempt at a Revolution
here? Premier Castro, did you really tell him this? McCarthy did horrible things
to stars. You told Mr. Legrasse that there was a secret that no man must know,
about man not being alone in the struggle for freedom. You told him you sailed
to strange ports and talked with undying leaders of the Revolution in China, I
guess, like Chairman Mao. When the stars signaled it, the Comrades would go from
the First World to the Third World. Marx and Lenin would never die and slogans
of the Revolution would always live but of course we all know that this has proven
to be true. Then, from Hollywood, we'd get another signal at another time. Then
some secret sources from outside our ranks would herald the signal for Liberation!
You told him that they knew everything going on in the world. I assume these secret
sources were the NKVD-KGB people! You spoke of the time when it would be easy
to know the right time for the Revolution: men would become wild and free with
no laws or morals; men would shout and kill and revel in Revolution, kill the
Kulaks and the Bourgeois scums! But today, could this be Yugoslavia? The bombing
of unarmed Iraqis? The fall of the Soviet Union to be replaced maybe by a true
Marxist system? Since I didn't see any Big Revolution later on, I figured these
were wrong guesses.
Mr. Legrasse then wrote down
some very strange things you told him which I can not decode or interpret at all.
You told him that Marx and Lenin were not composed of flesh and blood and that
their shape was not made of matter. What did you mean? Even stranger, he claims
you said that the Urals sunk under the sea and cut us all off from communication!
You told of secrets told from forgotten sea bottoms! Premier Castro, the Urals
did not sink and there were no submarines back then! You did give an important
clue for us: you said that the center of the Revolution was in Arabia! He wrote
that you also told him that it was completely secret and not affiliated with any
European group, including their witch cult. Well, of course it's not! We are Atheists!
But we are not secret anymore.
What I want to
ask you is this. Should we join the Islamic Fundamentalists? Is this the Revolution
in its new form? I can't be sure because they are not secret: they are highly
visible and active Revolutionaries but they are not Communists at all. Should
we affiliate ourselves with Santeria? That passes as a religion which is what
Mr. Legrasse thought he was dealing with. Is it that the Urals will sink in the
future and the secrets will be told by people who are on a nuclear sub? Or is
it that the nuclear sub will bomb the Urals and that will be the signal? Which
television shows should we watch so that the stars can signal us? Let me know
and I'll pass on the word.
Yours for the All People's
Revolution!
Mels Timiryazevovich Gonzalo a/k/a
Carlos
IN ORDER TO GRASP THE PURE LUNACY
HEREIN, ONE MUST READ THE STORY "THE CALL OF CTHULHU"
BY H. P. LOVECRAFT.
